Good To Know

It is good to know certain truths in life:  1- don’t spit out the window forward in a moving car,  2- don’t lie to your children, and 3- don’t eat a bunch of fiber if you have crohn’s disease.  Which leads to how I know the third is true.

J (the eldest) made chocolate and pb haystacks (with lowfat pb and all-bran).  I have an uncontrollable urge to eat chocolate and peanut butter.  I am seven years in remission from Crohn’s.  I ate one and NOTHING happened.

Fast forward to the next day.  I am cooking chili at the other child’s (k) home.  I spy some of said haystack candy on counter.  I ate one thinking that if one was did no harm…      Later, I ate another.  J came in and I informed her that I may have eaten a piece of candy.

J:  “That’s is okay I made them five, that leaves four.”

Me:   “um…three.”

J:  “I can’t believe you.”

Me:  “Yes. Yes you can, I don’t lie to my kids.”

J:  “That is NOT what I meant.  I can’t believe you sat there and ate two things full of peanut butter and all bran.  What were you thinking?”

Me: “They were good?  Besides, I was standing.”

Later, I was not standing.  I can’t believe me either.




The Old Days

I teach all day long.  I teach and learn from the freshmen.  Today I learned a very valuable lesson: Freshmen Do Not Listen.  I guess they are listening to something, but that is not me.

I showed a clip about Lavoisier, then a clip about various elements.  I put them on the smartboard.  I moved elements, ions, and compounds around.  I talked about them.  I had the students to talk about chemical reactions.  I think maybe physical science is coming alive for them.

Then…one small voice and a hand in the air.  I worry.  It is a cheerleader, straight-A, type A and the question is never pretty.

“Um,  Ms. B…”

“Ah, yes?”

“So, like before people discovered Oxygen what did they breathe?”  There is not a smile or trace of a smile in her face, only worry.

“Rocks.  We breathed rocks.”

“Uh, ok.”

Thank God the rest of the squad was there to point out that I was just joking.  One even explained that you could use things you did not understand. (One presumes Science)

It was even explained by one of the squad that “the USA was here before Columbus  discovered America. ”   Don’t worry, I did not touch that ball of confusion.   Let the social studies people deal with that conundrum.

Rocks.  That’s right.  I was thinking rocks because of the perceived grey matter in certain heads.