Years ago, I started teaching at a small country school. The students were admittedly strange. None stranger than the young man from a farming community that was excessively shy. I will call him Ishmel.
Ishmel came in one Monday early for class. I was alone in the room. I looked up and said “have a seat, we will start when the bell rings” Ishmel squirmed in his chair. He finally blurted out that he was going to get a running bar for his truck. I said that was nice. Ismel then informed me that “if I get a running bar, girls is going to talk to me in town…cause that is sexy…” I very gently informed him that MAYBE women were more interested in talk than running bars. None the less, Ishmel bought a running bar.
A few weeks later, Ishmel showed up in class early again. I asked how his experiment had gone. “Well, not too good…BUT…I done figured it out, I’m gonna get me running lights for the top of my bar…’cause that is sexy” Again, I informed Ishmel that I thought his method would not work. I even remember asking him if he had ever thought about getting out of his big truck and talking to a girl. To this day, I remember the horror on his face.
A few weeks went by, Ishmel shows up in class. “Maw B, that didn’t work… (No, really??) BUT…I know the problem. I’m gonna get me a big set of rims….Cause rims is sexy…” I finally managed to get out “You are probably right Ishmel. Rims is sexy.”
Needless to say, Ishmel is still single to this day. 18 years later, my children can stop any argument with the line “Rims is sexy…”